Filed under Personal development

Briggs Myers (MBIT) Personality Types at work

Getting along with the E types

  1. Get them to lead activities and keep the ball rolling
  2.  Give them lots of attention
  3. Socialise with them
  4. Talk to them as ideas occur to you
  5. Be generous with praise and acknowledgement
  6. Give them time to talk and do

Getting along with I types

  1. Do not pressure them to interact or speak in large groups
  2. Think first and then speak
  3. Respect their need for space and pricacy
  4. Be aware of their visual feedback when communicating , note their attention level
  5. Give them lime to read, think and process

Getting along with S types

  1. Appreciate their ability to be practical and realistic
  2. Stick to the facts
  3. Give step by step instructions
  4. Be open to feedback on the practicality of your ideas
  5. When working jointly, use planning tools like timetables, work plans
  6. Give them examples and details

Getting along with N Types

  1. Appreciate their creative ideas
  2.  join them in fantasising and exploring possible solutions
  3. Do not overburden them with data statistics or hard facts
  4. Avoid arguing about specifics
  5. Learn to accept other ways of knowing (gut feelings , intuition)
  6. Give them the big picture first

Getting along with F Types

  1. Acknowledge their ability to help put people at ease
  2. Don’t tell them they are too sensitive or emotional
  3. Don’t be sarcastic or tell them they are being illogical
  4. Listen to their concerns
  5. Consider the impact of your words before you speak
  6.  Beware of offering too much constructive criticism
  7. Show them appreciation

Getting along with T Types

  1. Appreciate their ability to be calm and detached
  2. Ask them what they think , not how they feel
  3. Listen for points of agreement and express your views
  4. Be prepared to give them the big picture first
  5. Accept that they may enjoy arguing for fun, it is not personal

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Beliefs and Values: Critical Questions to ask oneself

What drives our emotions and behaviours?

1) Beliefs & Values

2) Personality

 

Beliefs-At-That-Point-In-Time (BATPIT) are immediate thoughts in response to an event. By observing your BATPIT you can find the main drivers of your emotions and behavior

Underlying beliefs are fundamental and deep seated, and applied similarly across different situations.

How do detect your underlying beliefs? Ask yourself these questions

1) What does this event mean to you?

2) What is the worse / most upsetting part of the event for me?

3) What does that say about me?

4) What is so bad about my response?

 

Ways to detect your own BATPIT

1) Describe event objectively (who, what , when , where)

2) Describe your feelings and behaviours in response to the event

3) Ask yourself: What was i thinking that brought about my feelings / behaviour?

Inheriting Undesirable Traits Subconciously

Sometimes, you end up becoming the things you hate most about your parents.

I started Monday morning coaching call with a major A-ha moment. My sharp senior coach Yunn Ee told me” It is no coincidence that your mum does not see that you love her just as the way you do not see the importance of sleep”  First reaction: HUH ?

She got to know about my perception of REST, that since the age of 12 i have pretty much decided that SLEEP is for the dead. And that sleep is unproductive when i could be doing more. (Notice the state of mind as it decide ” i’m not doing enough”) Perhaps this explains why i have never slept before 12 midnight since the age of 12, unless i was sick or having jetlag. While in my head i would know the famous chinese saying “To rest is to prepare for the long journey ahead”, emotionally , i linked sleeping with guilt for enjoyment.

In the same way, my senior pointed out that my mum would always focus  on what i didn’t do (eg: leave a spot of messiness on the table when i had packed and cleared the rest of the table) instead of focusing on what i have done. This mentality is damaging on so many levels. I developed the same self- sabotaging qualities that causes me to focus on what i don’t have , did not do, and beat myself up over it. I rarely celebrated my wins and it causes serious contentment issues. 

I guess that’s why they say the fruit never falls far from the tree.

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Asiaworks LP126 Volunteers with Social Health Growth

Today i started the journey of my 1 hr a week community service, delivering donated canned food items to needy families. The families typically had many children or were much elderly. Looking through the family stat sheets, i felt sad and yet amazed how some families could pull of raising a family of 6 with just a very humble salary.  There are many disadvantaged families as i made my rounds around the 1-2 room flats. Most were dark and gloomy as suspectedly they didnt want to waste money on electricity.  Living room were pretty much turned into communal sleeping areas as well. The experience took on a whole new meaning of feeling grateful for even having a brightly lit and ventilated home.

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Rainbow centre: Raising S$1million in 30 days?!?

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Yeap, that’s the 30 + 6 crazy passionate people i’m going to spend the next 90 days of my life in intensity with.  Nope, we may not be meeting everyday, but not a day goes by without the passionate wins & celebration of each others goals.

We had our first WOW day meeting at a member’s beautiful castle somewhere in Orchard. Ben sold us a vision where we voted on doing an outrageous fund raising activity for Rainbow Centre who is building an extension wing to be able to increase capacity to house more children and training for their therapists and caretakers. in 30 days or so, the goal to raise a cool S$ 1 million and enroll the entire leadership alumni from Legacy to LP125 to join us in this big vision!!

It scares us, but that is what stretches us to our potential and to see how beautiful team dynamics can be when everyone can come together for a common vision and not let their feelings, attitudes and fixed beliefs get in the way. And it is heartening to see everyone volunteer to take up roles and break up into sub committees for work delegation (mind you everyone works a full time job , sans some lucky homemakers)

More updates on this to come

 

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Confronting my Fears.

On friday i made a lunch date with my leadership program senior. She had been volunteering in my life since Basic – Advanced and now to my Leadership program, and i know she does that because she loves and cares for us. (why else would anyone want to volunteer their precious time to mentor and coach people??)

Now i have been fearful of her because she has portrayed herself as the ultimate fierce bitch (at least to me) since basic and i have avoided her as much as possible. While being fierce, dominating and overbearing may be a turnoff to me,  deep in my heart… i know that i secretly admire the qualities she possessed:
1) Her crystal clear clarity  of her life purpose
2) Her decisiveness on problem solving difficult situations
3) Her ability to influence and win hearts of people
4) Sharpness to co-relate and make observations 

Qualities which i would very much love to have, but have been procrastinating to develop. Hence after advanced, i made a mental note that i would have lunch with this powerful woman one day just to have a casual chat with her about life.

 

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RIDE-BY-HUGS

Think Before I Speak

 

 

 

A useful note to self before i say anything. consider if it fulfils the following rules:
Think before you speak

Payphone Cover – (Maroon 5)

After my 3rd lesson i decided to try a little of playing something

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